Old Emails

I came across some old emails the other day.  They were from about 3 years ago (yes, I am a packrat – doing better with actual papers, but thankful for electronic storage).  I had just started to settle down in Greenville.  I hadn’t been back in the US for a year yet.  I was meeting new people, figuring out my job, finding a church, etc.

It was kind of fun to read through some of those first emails with people who I now call some of my closest friends.  Some of them were really funny and awkward, just because I had never met the folks and was trying to become friends over email.  I’m not sure how they got past my awkwardness, but so glad they did.

As sweet as it was to relive those memories, I was struck by something disheartening, almost shocking.  I was reading the emails of a different person.  Rarely, now, do my emails, phone calls, or other conversations sound like they did 3 years ago. 

That girl was so hopeful.  She was confident in what she knew God was directing her towards.  She was mindful of what God was doing in the large and small things around her.  She anticipated spiritual conversations and seized opportunities to put more faith in God and encourage others to do the same.

And as I sat there, all I could think was, “That’s not me…not anymore.”

I was heartbroken.  How have I let that passion fade?  Who have I become?  Where am I headed?

The past 4 years have been difficult.  Transition back to the States lasted as long as my time overseas, maybe longer.  And it seems, in many ways, to have been followed by a spiritual valley.  We all have to come down from the mountain at some point.  And even though every moment overseas wasn’t “mountain top” awesome, it was the mountain for me, spiritually. 

Though we feel closer to God and stronger in our faith on the mountain, that is not where life happens.  Our faith is lived out away from the mountain.  Our faith is refined away from the mountain.  As Oswald Chambers puts it, “The power of the saint lies in the coming down and in the living that is done in the valley.”

So how can we be sure we don’t falter or fade once we come down from the mountain?  How can we keep our faith constant and remain steadfast in Him?

We can’t.  We are not able.  We are not constant.  We are broken. 

But God is not.  He is able.  He is constant.

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.  – Hebrews 13.8

For I the Lord do not change. – Malachi 3.3

Our ability to remain in Him rests solely on Him.  He is our Constant One. 

When everything in and around us changes.  When nothing feels stable.  When our faith fades.  He is the same. 

“Believe God is the God you know Him to be when you are closest to Him.” - Chambers

He does not change, and His love for us remains the same.

He is the same God who revealed Himself on the mountaintop and in the fire.  He is the same God who initially drew us to Himself.  And He will draw us back to Himself.  He will draw us through His Word, through His people, through song…and sometimes through old emails.

Has Waiting Weakened Your Faith? - Paul David Tripp

I read this article by Paul David Tripp the other day on Facebook - pretty appropriate timing.  Tripp has an amazing way of reorienting our perspective to that of a Heavenly perspective.  His article on "Waiting" is no different.

5 Signs Waiting Has Weakened Your Faith

- Paul David Tripp

https://www.facebook.com/notes/paul-david-tripp/5-signs-waiting-has-weakened-your-faith/342442025798067

When God asks you to wait, what happens to your spiritual muscles? While you wait, do your spiritual muscles grow bigger and stronger, or do they become flaccid and atrophied? Waiting for the Lord isn't about God forgetting you, forsaking you, abandoning the ministry he's called you to, or being unfaithful to his promises. It's actually God giving you time to consider his glory, grow stronger in faith, and grow in courage for ministry. Remember, waiting isn't just about what you're hoping for at the end of the wait, but also about what you'll become as you wait.

So waiting always presents us with a spiritual choice-point. Will I allow myself to question God's goodness and progressively grow weaker in faith, or will I embrace the opportunity of faith that God is giving me and build my spiritual, pastoral, ministry muscles?

It's so easy to unknowingly revisit your belief system when you're not sure what God is doing. It's so easy to give way to doubt when you're being called to wait. It's so easy to forsake good spiritual and ministry habits and to take up habits of "unfaith" that weaken the muscles of the heart. Let me suggest some habits of "unfaith" that weaken us during waiting.

1. Giving way to doubt. There's a fine line between the struggle to wait and giving way to doubt. When you're called to wait you're being called to do something that wasn't part of your personal or ministry plan.Therefore you struggle to see it as good. Because you and I are typically convinced that what we wanted was right and good, it doesn't seem loving that we're being asked to wait. You can see how tempting it is then to begin to question God's wisdom, goodness, and love. Don't be naive: there is much doubt that visits people in ministry.

2. Giving way to anger. It's easy to look around and begin to think that the bad guys are being blessed and the good guys are getting hammered (see Psalm 73). There will be times when it simply doesn't seem right that you have to wait for something that seems so obviously good to you. It's tempting in your anger to give way to thinking you're smarter than God, that you'd be a better sovereign than the Sovereign. It all begins to feel like you're being wronged, and when it does, it seems right to be angry.

As a result, it's important to understand that your anger isn't so much about people and circumstances. No, you're angry with the One who's in control of those people and those circumstances. You're actually giving way to thinking that you've been wronged by him. I've been amazed over the years at how many pastors needed to confess to me that they were more than disappointed with their ministry life, they were angry with God.

3. Giving way to discouragement. This is where I begin to let my heart run away with the "If only_____," the "What if_____," and the "What will happen if____." I begin to give my mind to thinking about what will happen to me and my ministry if my request isn't answered soon, or what in the world will happen if it's not answered at all. This kind of meditation makes me feel that my life or ministry is out of control, when they are actually under perfectly wise and loving control. Rather than my heart being filled with joy, my heart gets flooded with worry and dread. Worry and dread are not the seedbed of hopeful, courageous, persevering ministry. So I spend my free mental time considering my dark future, with all the resulting discouragement that will always follow.

4. Giving way to envy. When I am waiting, it's tempting to look over the fence and long for the ministry life of someone who doesn't appear to have been called to wait. It's easy to take on an "I wish I was that guy" way of living. You can't give way to envy without questioning God's wisdom, faithfulness, and love. Here's the logic: if God really loves you as much as he loves that other guy, you would have what the other guys has. Envy is about feeling forgotten and forsaken, coupled with a craving to have what your neighbor enjoys. This is deadly, because you don't tend to run to someone for help if you've come to doubt him.

5. Giving way to inactivity. The result of giving way to all of these things is inactivity. If God isn't as good and wise as I once thought he was, if he withholds good things from his children, and if he plays favorites, then why would I continue to serve him? Maybe you don't consciously think these things, but you begin to stand with many pastors who've lost both their joy in and also motivation for ministry. Maybe this isn't what I'm supposed to be doing after all; maybe I've been kidding myself.

Sadly, this is the course that many people, even those in ministry, take as they wait. Rather than growing in faith, their motivation for daily pursuing God is destroyed by doubt, anger, discouragement, and envy. So the muscles of faith necessary for productive people-helping, God-honoring ministry, that were once robust and strong, now atrophy and grow weak.

In reality, waiting points us to God's goodness. He's wise and loving. His timing is always right, and his focus isn't so much on what you'll experience and enjoy, but on what you'll become. He's committed to using every tool at his disposal to rescue you from you, to shape you into the likeness of his Son, and to hone you for the work to which he's called you. Waiting is one of his primary shaping tools.

Habits of Faith

So how do you build your spiritual muscles during the wait? You must commit yourself to resist those habits of "unfaith," and with discipline pursue a rigorous routine of spiritual exercise. You must run to your Savior of grace, knowing his grace never gives up even though your often tempted to.

Here are the things that he's designed for you that will build the muscles of your heart and strengthen your resolve: the regular devotional study of his Word, consistent and candid fellowship, looking for God's glory in Creation every day, putting yourself under excellent preaching and teaching of Scripture (even preachers need to be regularly taught), investing your quiet mental time in meditating on the goodness of God (for example, as you are going off to sleep), reading excellent Christian books, and spending ample time in prayer. All of these things will result in spiritual strength and vitality.

Do these things seem obvious to you? You would be surprised how many pastors have confessed to me a lack of good spiritual habits. It is sad to think of how many pastors live in functional isolation, not putting their hearts in places where they can be watched, warned, protected, and nourished. Without daily meditating on God's glory and grace, all you're left to meditate on are the struggles within you and the problems outside you. No wonder our pastoral muscles grow weak.

Is God, in grace, asking you to wait? If so, what's happening to your muscles while you wait?

The Valley of Vision

Lord, high and holy, meek and lowly,

Though hast brought me to the valley of vision,

            Where I live in the depths but see in the heights;

            Hemmed in by mountains of sin I behold thy glory.

Let me learn by paradox

            That the way down is the way up,

            That to be low is to be high,

            That the broken heart is the healed heart,

            That the contrite sprit is the rejoicing spirit,

            That the repenting soul is the victorious soul,

            That to have nothing is to posses all,

            That to bear the cross is to wear the crown,

            That to give is to receive,

            That the valley is the place of vision.

Lord, in the daytime stars can be seen from deepest wells,

            And the deeper the wells the brighter thy stars shine;

Let me find thy light in my darkness,

            Thy life in my death,

            Thy joy in my sorrow,

            Thy grace in my sin,

            Thy riches in my poverty

            Thy glory in my valley.

- The Valley of Vision

Hypotheticals

Donald Miller wrote a blog a couple weeks ago entitled, A Creator Doesn’t Entertain Hypotheticals. Miller’s blog was talking about not entertaining hypotheticals as a writer, but when I first read the blog title, I immediately thought about God.

God doesn’t deal in hypotheticals. He doesn’t need to. He is all-powerful. He creates reality and deals in reality. I need hypotheticals because I’m not all-powerful and I’m not in control. The only thing I can even partially control is my mind (though it easily gets out of control and crazy), so I try to control situations in my mind.

I create hypothetical situations because it makes me feel in control and prepared, but that is not reality. I create hypotheticals because I would rather put my faith in a completely made up situation and fake control than in the One who really has all control and power. I’d rather let my mind go crazy over a hypothetical situation than spend time communicating with the One who’s actually in control.

So I freak out and come to God with all of my “What if’s…?” and He doesn’t even dismiss them. Instead, He comforts me with His “But God’s…” If I would just spend time focusing on His power and talking with Him, not only would I be continually reminded of Truth, but I wouldn’t have time for all of those hypotheticals.

“But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ… “- Ephesians 2.4-5

“but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” – Romans 5.8

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” – Psalm 73.26

Draw Near

"Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." - Hebrews 4.14-16

I think we all frequently find ourselves in places of "weakness" and "in time if need." I know I do, so when God brought me to this verse today, it brought me to tears...big ones. He then began to reveal my weaknesses and needs to me - weaknesses and needs He already knew about. Not only did He already know about them, but He already took those weaknesses on Himself. He continues to offer to bear our burdens for us if only we will let Him.

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” - Matthew 11.28-30

Why would He do this for us? Why would He do this for me? I'm such a mess. To think that He would take my sin on Himself is a humbling and amazing thought.

"But when Christ appeared as a high priest of the good things that have come, then through the greater and more perfect tent (not made with hands, that is, not of this creation) he entered once for all into the holy places, not by means of the blood of goats and calves but by means of his own blood, thus securing an eternal redemption. For if the blood of goats and bulls, and the sprinkling of defiled persons with the ashes of a heifer, sanctify for the purification of the flesh, how much more will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself without blemish to God, purify our conscience from dead works to serve the living God.

Therefore he is the mediator of a new covenant, so that those who are called may receive the promised eternal inheritance, since a death has occurred that redeems them from the transgressions committed under the first covenant." - Hebrews 9.11-15

"Indeed, under the law almost everything is purified with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness of sins.

Thus it was necessary for the copies of the heavenly things to be purified with these rites, but the heavenly things themselves with better sacrifices than these. For Christ has entered, not into holy places made with hands, which are copies of the true things, but into heaven itself, now to appear in the presence of God on our behalf. Nor was it to offer himself repeatedly, as the high priest enters the holy places every year with blood not his own, for then he would have had to suffer repeatedly since the foundation of the world. But as it is, he has appeared once for all at the end of the ages to put away sin by the sacrifice of himself." - Hebrews 9.22-26

"But in these sacrifices there is a reminder of sins every year. For it is impossible for the blood of bulls and goats to take away sins...

then he (Christ) added, “Behold, I have come to do your will.” He does away with the first in order to establish the second. And by that will we have been sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all.

And every priest stands daily at his service, offering repeatedly the same sacrifices, which can never take away sins. But when Christ had offered for all time a single sacrifice for sins, he sat down at the right hand of God, waiting from that time until his enemies should be made a footstool for his feet. For by a single offering he has perfected for all time those who are being sanctified." - Hebrews 10.3-4, 9-14

"Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus, by the new and living way that he opened for us through the curtain, that is, through his flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water." - Hebrews 10.19-22

We can draw near because Christ drew near to the Father when He came to earth for us.

"And when he came to the place, he said to them, “Pray that you may not enter into temptation.” And he withdrew from them about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed, saying, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.” And there appeared to him an angel from heaven, strengthening him. And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground." - Luke 22.40-44

We can draw near because He prayed that we would.

“I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me." - John 17.20-23

We must draw near so that we can have confidence and endurance.

"Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised. For,

“Yet a little while,
and the coming one will come and will not delay;
but my righteous one shall live by faith,
and if he shrinks back,
my soul has no pleasure in him.”

But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who have faith and preserve their souls." - Hebrews 10.35-39

Fear

Do not be afraid...

- Deuteronomy 31.6

There is so much fear everywhere. It surrounds us. There’s fear of disease; fear of money problems; fear of relationships; fear of job loss. I could go on and on. We are such a fearful culture, and really even a fearful world. Our fear actually leads to poor heath and even disease.

We spend so much time and energy on fear. In talking about fear, I once heard someone speak to how unreasonable fear is. He said that we spend so much time fearing things that probably won’t even happen. If you really think about it, that’s true.

So why do we fear?

I believe it comes down to hope and trust. Where do you place your hope? Where do you place your trust? Is it in you and your abilities? When I fear the most, I have typically placed my hope and trust in myself.

What’s wrong with placing your hope and trust in yourself?

You can be the smartest, strongest, most talented person alive, and if you place your hope and trust in yourself, you will fear. Why? Because no matter how talented you are, there are things beyond your control. And if the situation is out of your control, it doesn’t matter how talented or smart you are.

So where do we place our hope and trust that won’t ultimately end in fear? We place it in the Lord. In a do-it-yourself, self-confident, independent society, this is completely counter-cultural. Giving up our hope and trust means surrendering the control we think we have, and that is probably considered crazy by most. But that is what the Lord calls us to do.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding

- Proverbs 3.5

Lean not on your own understanding? That sounds crazy. We’re taught by our culture that if you work hard and use your talents and maybe do some good, things will (or should) work out for you. But God says that’s not the case.

God wants to take our fears off of our shoulders. He wants to free us of the burden of control and fear. God knows how hard it is to give up our control, and to give Him our trust, so He promises something in return.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

- Philippians 4.6-7

Peace. That’s a rare word in today’s culture, but what a comforting word. I don’t think anyone – regardless of belief, background, or circumstances – doesn’t like the thought of peace.

As follower of Christ, I know the peace that comes in giving Him control and trusting in Him. I also know the pain, anxiety, and turmoil that results in clinging tightly to control that will ultimately elude me. I prefer peace.

True, lasting peace only comes through a relationship with Jesus Christ. It begins with recognition of our sin and our need for forgiveness that can only be met in Him. Beginning a relationship with Christ is easy, but is the most important decision you will ever make. Jesus says He is the only way to the Father, and it is only by relinquishing control that we can know His peace.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

- John 14.27

‘We’re Looking to You’

“We’re helpless…We don’t know what to do; we’re looking to you.” 2 Chronicles 20.12 (The Message)

I’ve written about this verse before (I think on my last blog), but I decided I wanted to write on it again.  It’s just such a cool story of humility, reliance on God, and victory in God. 

Here is (without going into major Israelite history about which I’m not well educated) the context: 

Jehoshaphat was king of Judah.  Some people (Moabites, Ammonites, and Meunites) were about to attack Judah.  Jehoshaphat, for good reason, was worried.  He ordered a nationwide fast throughout Judah, seeking God’s help.  Then he prayed to God in front of all the people.  He recognized God for who He is, His power, and His love.  He presented the situation to God.  Then He prayed this:

‘We’re helpless before this vandal horde ready to attack us.  We don’t know what to do; we’re looking to you.’ (v.12)

He humbled himself in front of God and all of the people under his leadership.  He admitted he didn’t know what to do, and looked to God for the answer.  (A person in authority admitting they don’t have the answer right now and turning to God for it – that’s a blog all in itself; maybe another day.) 

What did the people do?

‘Everyone in Judah was there – little children, wives, sons – all present and attentive to God.’ (v.13)

They followed their leader…to the feet of their Lord.

And then it says a man named Jahaziel was ‘moved by the Spirit of God.’ (v.14)  God gave him the answer to their prayers.  He said to them:

‘God’s word:  Don’t be afraid; don’t pay any mind to this vandal horde.  This is God’s war, not yours.  Tomorrow you’ll go after them; see, they’re already on their way up the slopes of Ziz; you’ll meet them at the end of the ravine near the wilderness of Jeruel.  You won’t have to lift a hand in this battle; just stand firm, Judah and Jerusalem, and watch God’s saving work for you take shape.  Don’t be afraid, don’t wavier.  March out boldly tomorrow – God is with you.’ (v. 15-17)

And then Jehoshaphat and all the people laughed at Jahaziel, told him he was crazy, and began making preparations for war, while still freaking out, right?  Nope.

‘Then Jehoshaphat knelt down, bowing with his face to the ground.  All Judah and Jerusalem did the same, worshiping God.  The Levites…stood to their feet to praise God, the God of Israel; they praised at the top of their lungs!’  (v. 18-19)

So early the next morning they left for battle.  Here is part of the charge Jehoshaphat gave them:

‘Believe firmly in God, your God, and you lives will be firm!’ (v. 20)

The Jehoshaphat got a choir (you know, just your everyday wartime choir).  He put them in robes and made them march AHEAD of the troops singing.  What???  Are you serious?  Here’s what they were singing:

‘Give thanks to God, His love never quits.’ (v. 21)

Ok, stop.  Rewind.  So Judah is about to be attacked by several enemy armies.  Their kings says, “Wow, this isn’t good.  I have no idea what to do.”  They fast and pray.  One crazy guy says, “Oh yeah, God told me to tell you not to worry, He’s gonna take care of it.  No worries.”  The king is like, “Sweet, lets have a concert, as we go to battle.” 

Is this for real?  Yup.  Know why?  Because that’s how awesome God is.  That’s the kind of assurance, peace, and confidence in Him we get when we trust and follow Him.  Because He is Almighty and All-powerful.  Because when He says He’s got it under control, He’s got it under control.

Notice something else about the story so far?  There has been no other indication, besides the promise of God, that Judah would even be survive, let alone be victorious…And they are praising and singing to God about His awesome love.  All they have as they march into battle is the promise God spoke through one man.  That’s it.  They didn’t all grow into giants.  God didn’t help them develop some super secret strategy or some super awesome weapon.  He just gave them a promise.  And they believed Him.

Well, in case you are still wondering what happened…When the people of Judah started singing, God sent ambushes against the enemy armies, and they basically destroyed each other.  Judah arrived to see ‘a killing field of dead bodies.’  So Judah didn’t have to lift a hand.  They won because they trusted God and He fought their battle.

This story came to mind today as I was thinking about my family, the economy, my job, and other things that I like to worry about on a daily basis.  God just kept bringing to mind that verse, ‘We don’t know what to do, but our eyes are on You.’ 

Things are really hard for most people right now.  It seems like the economy is at the forefront of most people’s thoughts, but there are other problems, too.  I know I can’t understand anyone else’s problems, so it seems like it would be naïve of me to offer a solution.  That would be true if the solution was a solution I came up with.  Fortunately, it’s not.  It’s God’s solution.

Trust God. 

God gave Judah a promise through one man.  They believed Him.  They believed Him for no other reason, except that He is God.  And they won.

God gave us a Promise, too.  And that Promise humbled himself, came to earth, and died so that we could have the ultimate victory.  He didn’t die just so we could live forever in Heaven.  He died so we could have eternal life.  That life starts now.  That life in Christ starts as soon as we put our faith in Him.  As soon as we accept that He won the war against the enemy and death, we begin to live a victorious life.

‘For, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” ‘ (Romans 10.13, NIV)

This doesn’t mean we don’t need to do anything or work hard or have a job.  It just means we don’t need to worry.  We don’t need to fear.  God has said He is on our side.  We just have to trust Him.  Even when we can’t see what’s ahead or all we can see is a huge storm cloud and a cliff, trust Him.  When you don’t know what to do, turn your eyes to Him.

‘God has assured us, “I’ll never let you down, never walk off and leave you.” ‘ (Hebrews 13.5, Msg)

 

Main passage:  2 Chronicles 20

He Doesn't Waiver, Even When We Do

Desert Song by Hillsong

This is my prayer in the desert
And all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in the hunger in me
My God is a God who provides

And this is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flames

And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon forged against me shall remain

I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

And this is my prayer in the battle
And triumph is still on it's way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be empited again
The seed I've recieved I will sow


"Believe God is always the God you know Him to be when you are nearest to Him."
-Oswald Chambers