Christ Centered Relationships - Part 2 (Partner and Submit)

Several weeks ago, I talked about a series of messages that Francis and Lisa Chan did on Christ-Centered Relationships. Lisa did the majority of the speaking in the second message, focusing on partnering and submitting. Francis introduced the talk with a few tough truths about all of us:

• - We really like Jesus, but if we’re honest with ourselves we don’t want to become like him.
• - We admire His humility, but we don’t want to be that humble.
• - We are thankful that Jesus would be abused, but we would never let that happen to ourselves.
• - We love that Jesus laid down His rights, but we will fight for ours.

Those thoughts are not consistent with what we are instructed in the Word, though:

“…whoever says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked.” – 1 John 2.6

What a great introduction to the idea of submission and partnering as women. Lisa’s message in conjunction with the Partnering section of the Ezer study at Grace Church have been both clarifying and challenging to me, and have provided wonderful, Biblical guidance.

We are called to submit to God (James 4.7) and then to each other out of reverence for Christ and the authoritative order He has established (Ephesians 4.21). I should not expect my attempts at submission to others to be positive or successful until I have first submitted my life to Christ.

What does a life submitted to Christ look like?

And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.” – Luke 9.23-24

“If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.” – Luke 14.26-27

A life submitted to Christ sacrifices self and embraces the life of Christ. It puts the agenda of self to death and embraces the agenda of Christ. Submission to Christ means intentionally owning the cause of Christ as my own.

Submission to others, namely a husband, comes after we submit to Christ. If we have not embraced Christ’s cause and agenda, we will not view marriage as He does – as a picture of Christ and the church (Ephesians 5.22-32) – and will instead view marriage by the world’s standard – an institution designed for our happiness and security. With a wrong view of marriage, we will either make no attempt at submission or it will be a constant, painful struggle, always ending in failure. If, instead, we embrace Christ’s agenda and His plan for marriage, our perspective will change. Submission and partnering will still be a struggle at times and we will still fail, but those struggles and failures will sanctify us and teach us to rely more on Christ’s strength, not our own. And He will bring victory.

Partnering is about owning the cause of another. In marriage, it means coming alongside your husband, lending strength to him, and owning his cause as your own. Submission is part of owning that cause, and is one way God has given us as Christian women to be set apart from culture - to point people to Him through our lives. It’s not about rules and roles. It’s about loving Christ, loving others, and serving. Partnering is bigger than submission. Partnering is bigger than my wants, my kingdom. It’s about living my life to see His Kingdom come and His will be done.